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resoluteI think it must be very vexing to my solutions-oriented spouse to live in a household of people whose first emotional response to suggestions for improvements/solutions is "there's no point that will never work I shall lie here in a puddle for the rest of my life."
I hate showering, you understand.
I don’t like how it gets cold, I don’t like water on me, and I DETEST water on my face, especially in my eyes. I have for my entire life.
My spouse asked if we wanted to brainstorm possible mitigations to make showers somewhat less unpleasant for me.
How I felt: What is the point, nothing will ever work, I will just suffer forever, this is the consequence of me being a freak, if I was a normal person I wouldn’t mind showering, this is nothing more than what I deserve.
What I said: Yeah, let’s brainstorm and see what we come up with.
After some thinking, my spouse came up with two things to try. One is to heat the bathroom prior to starting a shower and the other is to wear swim goggles on days I don’t wash my hair.
My spouse: “Do you want to try either or both of these options?”
Me: “I have two replies. First, there is no point because suffering is all I deserve for being a freak and nothing will work anyway so why put in the effort to make changes. Second, yes, let’s do those, because rationally the worst that happens is I gain and lose nothing, and perhaps it might provide a benefit, and because my feelings are self-sabotaging assholes who need to jump in the oubliette.”
I hate showering, you understand.
I don’t like how it gets cold, I don’t like water on me, and I DETEST water on my face, especially in my eyes. I have for my entire life.
My spouse asked if we wanted to brainstorm possible mitigations to make showers somewhat less unpleasant for me.
How I felt: What is the point, nothing will ever work, I will just suffer forever, this is the consequence of me being a freak, if I was a normal person I wouldn’t mind showering, this is nothing more than what I deserve.
What I said: Yeah, let’s brainstorm and see what we come up with.
After some thinking, my spouse came up with two things to try. One is to heat the bathroom prior to starting a shower and the other is to wear swim goggles on days I don’t wash my hair.
My spouse: “Do you want to try either or both of these options?”
Me: “I have two replies. First, there is no point because suffering is all I deserve for being a freak and nothing will work anyway so why put in the effort to make changes. Second, yes, let’s do those, because rationally the worst that happens is I gain and lose nothing, and perhaps it might provide a benefit, and because my feelings are self-sabotaging assholes who need to jump in the oubliette.”
no subject
Date: 2022-12-01 05:30 pm (UTC)