Most of my memories are like fiction

[resolute]

I saw a post on Tumblr that made me think about my college years.

I don't have a lot of clear memories of college. (For the record, I am Gen X, I am An Old as far as Tumblr is concerned.) Those I do have? All look like I am seeing them on a vid screen. Like I am watching "me" act in scenarios. Like I am piloting a mech, and the mech is me. It's not third person omniscient, I'm not seeing it from outside my body. But it is similar to a work of fiction written in third person with VERY tight focus.

I wonder --

How much of that is because I was autistic masking SO HARD in college?

My memories were recorded like they were happening to someone else in part because I was trying to hard to BE someone else?

ND and NT people, how are your decades-old memories recorded? First person? Tight third? Third omniscient?

:chinhands:

Comments

More or less NT here

[jesse_the_k]

...and they're always "tight third person" hearing myself tell the story to somebody else (a friend, a therapist).

And I realized last week that a story I'd been telling the world (and myself) is off by a year. Very disturbing: I want to be an accurate narrator of my life! At 68 the memories already made (and remade, as talkswithwind importantly writes) outnumber the ones left to make.